My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Randomize
