Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Randomize
