There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
