it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
