She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
