i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
