he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
