i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Do you have feelings for this penis?
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