I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Randomize
