What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
