wakey wakey hands off snakey
My hand turned me down
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
