Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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