i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
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