Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
