Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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