remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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