I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
