They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
