So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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