ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
