I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
