Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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