absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
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