I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
