one might say we're banned from that church
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
