i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Randomize
