What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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