Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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