Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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