Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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