You work out of a Hotel?
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
