dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
