If i come over, it means nothing
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize