Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
