So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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