Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
