Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
