Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize