I heard we made out
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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