last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize