Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
