I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Randomize
