I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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