You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
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