My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
