So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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