Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I'm drive I can fine osifer
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
