Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
