dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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