? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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